Every “yes” is a “no"
As human beings, we are limited. We wake up each day to a finite portion of time and energy. This means that every time we say "yes" to one thing we are saying "no" to everything else.
Feeling overcommitted and exhausted is a helpful red flag signaling poor boundaries. I’d like to invite you toward both wholehearted “yeses” and thoughtful, confident “nos” that will bring rest to your weary soul and align your commitments with what you value most.
Exercise: Before saying “yes” to something, identify what it is a “no” to.
For the next month, refrain from agreeing to anything in the moment. Write a script to use in place of saying “yes” when something is asked of you.
For example, “Thank you for asking. Let me get back to you about that.” Or “Thank you for the opportunity. Let me look at my calendar and get back in touch with you.”
Then, without the pressure of immediate response, consider what you would be saying "no" to in order to take on this task. How does this align with your values?
For example, if I say “yes” to answering my mom‘s phone call immediately, I am saying “no” to whatever I was already doing (Listening to a friend, grocery shopping, working, etc.). If I say “yes” to answering work emails outside of work hours, I am saying “no” to being fully present to my family/loved ones.
Final note of encouragement: You have permission not to “yes” to every good thing. Jesus Himself said “no” to good opportunities in order to say “yes” to what the Father was asking of Him (see Mark 1:35-38). The question is not “Is this a good thing to do?” But rather “Is this what the Lord is asking of me right now?”
